Book Review: For Women Only, Revised and Updated Edition by Shaunti Feldhahn

I received a copy of the revised and updated edition of Shaunti Feldhahn's book, For Women Only.  I've been to numerous women's events and marriage retreats so I was familiar with the author's name and the line of books she has previously produced, yet I had never read one.  I was pleased to find that the information is well researched and is well presented throughout the book.  The research is eye-opening and could be extremely beneficial to understanding the men in your life.

The author had opportunities to survey and interview a variety of men to get gut-level, honest answers to the questions that men feel unable to explain in day-to-day conversations.  The author writes, "after interviewing and surveying thousands of men, I can tell you the answers to common perplexities are all related to what is going on in your man's inner life.  Most are things he wishes you knew but doesn't know how to tell you.  In many cases, they're things he has no idea you don't know."

I thought this book offered good insight to the man's perspective and explained the differences between how we are wired to process in various areas of our lives.  I have already recommended this book to friends.  I would highly suggest it to women in all stages of marriage and I think it could be greatly beneficial to the newly-wed or soon-to-be wed woman.

This book is relatively short, however, I found the information in it to require additional processing time.  I have already purchased her book, For Parent's Only, waiting to be read on a rainy day and I have also considered buying her book, "For Men Only" as a gift for my husband.

I received this book from the Blogging for Books program in exchange for this review.

2014 Reading List

1) A Hickory Ridge Christmas - Dana Corbit
2) The Heart Remembers - Irene Hannon
3) Freefall - Kristen Heitzmann
4) Deadly Devotion - Sandra Orchard
5) The Unexpected Gift - Irene Hannon
6) Silenced (Alaskan Courage Book #4) - Dani Pettrey
7) Trapped - Irene Hannon
8) For Women Only - Shaunti Feldhahn
9) Undetected - Dee Henderson
10) Fame - Karen Kingsbury
11) Forgiven - Karen Kingsbury
12) Found - Karen Kingsbury
13) Family - Karen Kingsbury
14) Forever - Karen Kingsbury
15) Redemption - Karen Kingsbury
16) Remember - Karen Kingsbury
17) Sunrise - Karen Kingsbury
18) Summer - Karen Kingsbury
19) Return - Karen Kingsbury
20) Someday - Karen Kingsbury
21) Sunset - Karen Kingsbury
22) Rejoice - Karen Kingsbury
23) Reunion - Karen Kingsbury
24) Deceived - Irene Hannon

All in my head

I enjoy lots of hobbies.  At least I think I do.  I have a sort of eclectic collection of interests.  One of those is writing, but you wouldn't know it by my blog or my journal.  Life seems to catch up to me quicker than I can get it all done.  Anyone else have that problem?  I have multiple blog posts written in the twists and turns of this crazy head of mine.  They are probably as numerous as the books waiting to be read on my bookshelf. 

I love to read too.  A few years ago I took off in a race to see how many books I could devour in a year.  It was really eye opening that it was possible to read that many books and enjoy them.  Lately, that too is just waiting for a moment.  A moment to read and enough energy to stay awake for page two.

I enjoy doing crafty things.  I have a variety of them ready and waiting.  Things like cross-stitch, jewelry making and cake decorating.  On occasion I even break out the sewing machine for a few simple projects.  For Christmas I received an acrylic painting set that my husband was so hesitant to buy because of this hobby delay disorder.  I'm super excited to use it...but it rests, not yet used for the first time.

I enjoy cooking and creating new things in the kitchen also.  Although I must make time for cooking, it is rarely any of those new and exciting pin-worthy super mom creations.  

I enjoy clear and organized space.  Something that really doesn't match the creative side of my mind.  It also doesn't match the current state of my life or my home.  If given ample amount of time, I might find what I'm searching to find.

I LOVE to date my husband. To sit and talk, laugh and enjoy each other and maybe even eat food I did not cook.  Life really takes over this one.  Miles away from family and living on a limited budget, it's not always easy to find that date night. 

I enjoy spending time with friends and welcoming them into my home.  But to get to the enjoyment part, I usually struggle with the rant and rave, dirty looks and exasperated fit-throwing get it clean part.  Because I know ALL my friends live in super clean, white glove homes where never a piece is out of place.  Did I mention that they NEVER rant and rave or give their children dirty looks?

I could tell you that I enjoy exercise especially running, but that would be a lie.  I wish I enjoyed exercise even running because I know these really awesome mom friends that I hang out with and they run - not walk - 5K's, half marathons and even full marathons in all their spare time. 

I'm sure you are wondering where this blog post is going...because I am beginning to ask myself.  Did I mention it's all in my head?  Yes, the things that hold me back most - are all in my head.  Many of them are lies.  Lies that lead to fear. The fear of failure. The fear of imperfection.  The fear of not living up to someone else's standards.  The fear of doing it wrong, all wrong.  

Thankfully, God did not call me to live in fear.  He has given me a spirit of power, love and self-discipline. He has created me to do the things that he prepared in advance for me to do.  He promises me wisdom when I ask, strength when I am weak and hope beyond measure.

In the midst of unwritten blog posts, unread books, incomplete craft projects, repeated meals, store-bought cookies, piles of papers, dateless months, failed-to-issue invitations and never to be ran 5K's resides the heart of a family. My family.  My live in chaos, beautiful mess family. A family not to be defined by the undone.  A family to be defined by the love and grace of Jesus and his mornings filled with new mercies.  Here I will choose to search for truth.  Truth that sets me free from those lies that are all in my head.

The Dynamite Song

A few nights ago I laid down with Little Princess at bedtime to snuggle for a few minutes.  She was listening to a CD and asked me if this CD had the Dynamite Song on it.  I tried multiple times to ignore her since I did not have any clue what song she was referring to; however, she just couldn't let it go.  I'm glad she didn't or I wouldn't have this funny memory to record.

Little Princess:  Mom, you know, the Dynamite Song.
Me:  No, I don't think I know the Dynamite Song.
Little Princess:  Yes, you do.  It goes like this:  "This little dyn-a-mite, I'm gonna let it shine, let it shine, let it shine."
Me: (refraining from hysterical laughter) OH, you mean, "This little LIGHT of mine"  OK, I do know THAT song.  Let's sing it.

I concluded my snuggle time singing "This Little Light of Mine" with my Little Dynamite.

"A cheerful heart is good medicine."  Proverbs 17:22

Family Fun Plus One

It has become a tradition to go swimming on Father's Day.  This is not necessarily a tradition born out of my husband's love of swimming.  It is the type of tradition that is born out of the ever-expanding memories of our children that constantly remind us of things with statements that begin like this, "You remember that one time you ______ (fill in the blank). Can we do that again?"

In my old age I must admit I have become somewhat of a "Debbie Downer" or "Negative Nancy" - especially when it comes to swimming in the summer.  Swimming in the winter is somewhat more bearable, in my opinion, because it involves heated indoor pools, warm (not scorching hot) walkways and does not require the use of sunscreen.  Given the unusually cooler temperatures our area has been enjoying this spring I was certain the water would be nowhere near the temperature in which I prefer to fully submerge my body.  That said, out loud.  We journeyed to the local YMCA water-park and embarked on our annual Father's Day swim. 

The water was COLD.  I do not know how our children can splash right in and never blink an eye.  After several minutes of slowly walking across the pool we were finally able to breathe again.  Preacherman was certain hypothermia had began to set in.  We spent some time in the pool (debating if we could leave yet) then moved on to a few rounds in the Lazy River and then back to the main pool.  

Many of you may know that we are in the process of taking some foster parenting classes and hope to add  another child (or two) to our family.  This Father's day outing to the pool gave us an unusual glimpse of what that might look like.  

I was no longer interested in being "in" the pool, so I sat on the edge and watched Rockstar on the lily pads and began tossing some Splash Bombs to Crazy Horse.  Rockstar and Little Princess moved on to the feature area with Preacherman as Crazy Horse and I continued our game of catch.  All of a sudden with no warning a male child, likely near Crazy Horse's age, jumped in the pool between us and entered our game.  Now I was throwing the splash bombs to two children of similar size and age and watching them, with a smile on my face, as I saw for the first time what another child might add to our family.  I was amazed that out of all the people at a pool on a Sunday afternoon that this child had decided to join us.  They were fun to watch as they both called for the ball to be thrown to them and the "fight" to catch the ball that ensued with each toss.  The smiles across their faces, the feigned frustration with each other and the pure enjoyment they were having warmed my heart.

Preacherman soon joined us, as did Little Princess who immediately wanted all the balls tossed to her.  The young boy quickly added Preacherman to the game of toss.  I kept looking around thinking his parents might show up and wonder who we were and why we were playing catch with their son.  No one ever asked.

We don't know this young boy's story.  We do know that we had fun and enjoyed sharing our game with him.  Preacherman asked the boy if he was there with his family.  No.  He was there with his coach.  I'm not sure what the boy's family life is like, but I am happy to know he has a coach who cares enough to spend Father's Day taking him to the pool.

Book Review: A Kingsbury Collection by Karen Kingsbury

I recently had the opportunity to read the three novel collection, A Kingsbury Collection, by Karen Kingsbury.  I have read several of Karen Kingsbury’s books and usually enjoy them to tears.  I had not previously read any of the stand alone novels in this collection.  The novels in this collection include: Where Yesterday Lives, When Joy Came to Stay and On Every Side.

Where Yesterday Lives follows Ellen Barrett, a prize winning journalist, as she examines her present, revisits her past and dreams of her future.  When Joy Came to Stay is a story of Maggie Stovall.  A woman who appears to have it all together and finds herself falling apart at every turn.  The novel, On Every Side, tells the story of Faith Evans and her fight to save a precious community statue of Jesus in a city park and the heart of a boy she knew long ago.

I enjoyed each title in this collection.  A couple of the stories included story-lines related to adoption which is very close to my heart.  I love how Karen Kingsbury creates characters and story-lines that are real, relational and relevant.  I would recommend her books to any avid fiction reader.  I strongly recommend the e-book format.  I found the size of this book to be a bit cumbersome to read and carry.

I received this book for free from WaterBrook Multnomah Publishing Group for this review.

2013 Reading List

Here's to another year of enjoying some of my favorite authors and finding new ones!

1) Simple Secrets - Nancy Mehl
2) Where Yesterday Lives - Karen Kingsbury
3) Shattered - Dani Pettrey
4) When Joy Came to Stay - Karen Kingsbury
5) On Every Side - Karen Kingsbury
6) Battle Hymn of the Tiger Mother - Amy Chua
7) Created to be His Help Meet - Debi Pearl (I do not recommend this book)
8) Vanished - Irene Hannon
9) The Longest Ride - Nicholas Sparks
10) Unspoken - Dee Henderson
11) His Mistletoe Family - Ruth Logan Herne
12) Christmas in the Air - Irene Brand/Dana Corbit
13) Bring Me Home for Christmas - Robyn Carr
14) Stranded - Dani Pettrey